Saturday, November 10, 2007

NEWS FLASH! Speedway Doesn't Have Cappuccino

Today a study found that the retail gasoline giant Speedway is decieving the public by serving what it claims to be cappuccino. Allegedly Speedway is buying some sort of instant "cappuccino" mix and supplying it to caffiene junkies through an automatic dispenser. (Real cappuccino is actually espresso coffee topped with frothy steamed milk, not coffee flavored cocoa.) Soccer-cow and republican lard-ass Tanita Sims was quoted as saying, "Ah Lahk cappy-chino." To find out more, we asked a local barrista if they encountered any difficulties. The barrista, who chose to remain anonymous, said, "About once or twice a week some over-paid idiot will come in, order a cappuccino, and demand their money back when they find out it doesn't have vanilla-hazelnut flavoring and copious amounts of sugar. Money can buy love, but it can't buy class." Speedway was unavailable for comment.

This one is NSFW!!!!!!!

This one is NSF anywhere!


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